So I got carpal tunnel from stirring big giant pots of food in Louisiana. I decide that I need some kind of Eastern medicinal treatment while I’m in Shanghai to balance out all the pills from my Western doctor. Who knew what I was getting myself into? Not I!

My Mom decides to send me to the Orthopedics hospital since they specialize in stuff like carpal tunnel. I get x-rays, cat scanned up and they determine that my neck is too straight. I’ve lost my natural curvature in the vertebrae of my neck causing pressure on my nerves, therefor giving me carpal tunnel.

Straight as an Arrow

To remedy this, I start off with a fun table contraption that I get strapped into and it proceeds to pull me and stretch me and all sorts of crazy chiropractic things to me. Then they screw six needles into my neck, then I get an iv at the base of my spine, followed up with iv’s for the next seven days.

Puncture Wounds

After all the 2hr iv sessions every day for seven days, I get a final day of treatment where I get an electric massage which is by the way, one of the worst feelings in the world. The pads of electricity aim at your nerves so whichever body part the pad is on, it goes nuts. Your arms go flailing all over, you twitch uncontrollably and it just hurts. Then I proceed to get needles in the neck again, with the iv at the base of my spine, which happens to numb you from that point down, so I feel like I was just beaten up from the waist down. Then I get an iv in my hand while I have an iv in my spine. As I lay there with the doctor pretty much just hanging out next to me, he proceeds to asks me things like, “Are you married?” “Oh well you’re 30, that’s old. You should have children by now.” Oh how I love Chinese people.

IV Room

In conclusion, my carpal tunnel is totally remedied. My neck’s a little sore but all in all, I feel great.

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